Saturday, August 1

Indians @ the movies (part 1)

I went for my first Bollywood movie here and it opened my eyes. I saw things in the cinema hall that I have not seen in a while. Then I figured all those things I saw and more apply to Indians and Indians only. I am not making fun of Indians here. I am just highlighting the stereotypes.

Here is what we Indians believe about movies (when we are in a movie hall):

  1. A good performance has to be appreciated in the movie hall itself. You don't want to wait till you meet Saif next to tell him you liked his comedy. What if you forget? He might feel bad.
  2. Why pay 4 times for Samosas when wifey can cook em at home and sneak em in?
  3. Cell phones have to ring. Why put it on silent mode when you have 'I like to move it move it' as your ring tone? Every one loves that song and deserves to enjoy it.
  4. I will take my kid to watch any movie with me till he is 5 years old. After that, he will start to understand things and these movies will have a bad influence on him. He won't understand anything till he is 5. I guess that's why they don't sell tickets for kids who are 5 or younger. He can sit in my lap while I watch the movie.
  5. You must wear fresh jasmine flower in your hair. It only adds to the ambiance of the movie hall.
  6. I have to tell my friend what I think about this scene right now. We always watch movies together. Today he is sitting 6 seats away from me but that doesn't change the way we watch movies.
  7. Why do I look at the ticket to see where I have to sit? I will call my friend and find out. The movie just started like 10 minutes back so its ok if he talks on the phone. Plus I am sure he did not put his phone on silent mode. His ringtone is 'I like to move it move it'. Every one loves that song and deserves to enjoy it.
  8. I will behave if I actually mein meet Deepika Padukone. Now she can't see me so it is ok to whistle. Plus, all my friends are whistling at her. I don't want them to think I am gay or something. I promise I will behave when I see her for real.
  9. I am so happy I started a coversation while waiting in this movie hall. My next question will be 'Are you a gujju/bengali/tamil/marwadi?'. I know this is not 'Gujarat/West Bengal (or just Kolkatta)/Tamil Nadu/Rajasthan. I know this is a different country but it is possible that he is from 'Gujarat/West Bengal (or just Kolkatta)/Tamil Nadu /Rajasthan'.
  10. I know Madan bhai will call. He calls after dinner every day and we talk about the stock market. He doesn't know I am at the movie hall but that is ok. I know my phone is not on silent mode but why put it on silent mode when I have 'I like to move it move it' as my ring tone? Every one loves that song and deserves to enjoy it.
More to follow...

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

i have to admit, all this sounds very suspiciously familiar..

El Mariachi said...

hahahah...sarcasm is my favorite emotion!

n i loved the way u used "i like to move it move it" repeatedly! :)

Alok said...

dude...where is the part 2 of this post???

G2 said...

never got a chance to work on part 2...it is on the to do list for 2011 now :)
how about you write something and I will guest-host it on my blog...and it can be on your blog too :)